.::Cursed::.

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Sunday, July 07, 2002 @ 1:00 A.M.

Seriously scary

I just got home from one of the scariest situations in life...

My father was rushed to the Emergency Room at Valley Medical with a concussion. When my mom started yelling for someone to call 911, I rushed to see what was the matter and all I saw was my daddy laying facedown on the ground. My whole body felt like it went numb and I went on automatic dialing the phone. When the operator asked me questions about my dad's condition, I began to get hysterical. I shoved the phone at Rogee. After that, the ambulance came, they put him on a stretcher and we headed to the hospital. I hate hospitals, doctors, and the whole insurance crap that we have to deal with. Medicine and needles make me queasy. I just wanted to get the Hell outta there. I wanted my daddy to be all better. I couldn't stand to see him on that hospital bed looking so weak. When I called Roach, I was still in shock. It wasn't until I called work from the Emergency Room that it all hit me. The sudden realization of my father's mortality washed over me and I began to weep uncontrollably. Thank God that Rogee was there to comfort me. He really tried hard to keep the situation not so serious, but I'm such a worry-wort. I kept thinking about what COULD have happened. I don't know what to do now...

All I know is that my daddy is not at 100% right now. Please, please, please pray that he'll be all right. Last time I felt this way was when beloved told me he had to break up with me. Emotionally numb... and wearing a mask of everything is all right. Huh... I need to work to keep myself going or I won't be able to function properly. I just hope that I don't get pushed too far over the edge tomorrow. God in Heaven, I pray for strength to get through this.

Love is good, too...

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